Letting my mind wander

Where does the time go?  It seems to fly by when you get to your 40s.  I guess it keeps on accelerating, the older you get.  Do you remember when you were young and how it would drag?   Everything's a circle:  We come into this world with nothing and we leave the same way.  Is there a meaning to life?  Is it the same for everyone?

I feel that everyone has something to achieve, they just might not know it yet and I'm not talking about getting a job, having a new car or owning a home.

It's funny how education is used to educate some very important things out of us.  Children are working towards exams at ages when they should be playing and enjoying growing up rather than getting stressed as they're put on the treadmil for the future labour pool.  There's a time for work and a time for play for people of ALL ages but it's so easy to lose that if you're not careful, by getting caught up in having to earn enough to get by in our materliastic society.

Spirituality is something that should be taught but outside of religion as, to my mind,  they're clearly seperate subjects.  The value of sitting in silence in a quiet, peaceful area instead of in front of a TV set that maybe churning out more rubbish is something that parents should be passing down to their children.  Taking them out to nature in an educated way rather than taking their noise and chaos out there with them.  Helping them feel and recognise the energy of the Universe.

I found myself thinking these thoughts as I was having accupuncture yesterday.  It was a different nurse sticking the needles in and deeper than usual.  I have accupuncture for Chronic Pain Syndrome (I think chronic just means that it's lasting a long time).  It helps with the PTSD as well though.  I relax into some deep breathing and let the needles do their work and I'm soon watching colours inside my eyes:  greens, blues and blacks, as they swirl around.  They chase eachother and bump into eachother.  Taking on eachother's colours, as they morph right in front of my eyeballs.  I resisted the urge to chuckle as I wondered if this was what it was like to be on speed.

I thought about the week.  It was a very busy one medically: Psychiatrist on Monday, Counsellor on Tuesday and then being used as a voodoo doll on the Wednesday.  I always feel like drinking a large glass of water afterwards to see if I'm going to leak or not. 

Today I actually found myself breathing a sigh of relief as I settled into a more manageable routine.

I'm glad that all the editing's up to date and the back ups are done.  Business Link sent me a form for a press release to publicise my work and that's just finished too and been sent back and I may have found a company to do my canvas prints in Nottingham.  I'm having a meeting with the company tomorrow.

So the priority over the next week will be to finalise which images will be in the exhibition and which poems will accompany them.  After that it's time to put it together as a draft exhibition plan and start getting companies and galleries interested in getting involved and to get help with the funding application.

It's funny how you feel like you haven't done much at times, until you write about it and take stock of the week.  Still, I'm working on things in a careful, manageable way and seeing to my needs along the way.  No point in trying to run and land on your arse is there?

So another Christmas beckons.  I've already got 2 presents each for my son and daughter and I'm sure that they'll like them.  I never spoilt my kids in that way.  I'm looking forward to seeing them both and sharing some time.  It'll be good to sit and talk and reconnect.  We'll probably play cards, scrabble and monopoly together too as well as doing some activities that they both want to do. 

My daughter played the Last Post for me over the phone the other day.  My son gave me a rendition of his drumming skills to some grunge tune.  They're both walking their own paths and the wolf's just hanging back in the shadows should they need him.  They're developing into good people.

It's going to be a good Christmas this year.

Later

Wolf

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